Sunday, October 3, 2010

A Few Cents and Thoughts: Dad Blogs

I decided to postpone my next post in "The Truth Balance" to post a response of sorts to the growing thought within the dad blog community that "we suck" and "we do it all wrong". In the last few days I have read more and more posts, comments and tweets that suggest that dad bloggers suck, that dad bloggers are just doing everything wrong and will never be as successful as mom bloggers, and so on. I have been mulling the idea and thought behind this post all day and I just figured, what have I got to lose? There are several points that I have come across within the whole conversation and reactions found around the web and I am going to just touch briefly on each one and throw my thoughts out there.  *Note: This post is not a personal attack on anyone, or any blogs, writings or etc. I just found the swaying fence of the topic intriguing and I had a response to it.*

Dad blogs suck - Um, okay, first off, says who? I know I don't have a top notch blog with 1000 readers and subscribers, tons of ads clogging up the sidebars and all that. And yes, some of you may think it just flat out sucks. If you do, tell me, don't categorize me. The question is who are we letting decide this and why are we letting it dictate a general thought about all dad blogs? When did it become the thing to automatically join the thoughts of few, then provide it as truth to the masses?

Dad blogs will never be as successful as mom blogs - How does one measure the success of a parenting blog? Is it the number of readers and subscribers? Is it the number of sponsorships, ads, and giveaways? Is it the money generated through selling one's own products and google ads? I'm not sure. I don't really think anyone can really measure the success of a blog. Success, in my opinion, can only be measured by the writer based on whatever they are trying to accomplish. If you are trying to bank 100 dollars a month in ads and you do, then success. If you are trying to average 1000 unique visits a month and you do, success. If you are just looking to write for your sake and people read it and like it anyway, success. No, dad blogs might not get the world's attention (the CNN piece was a crock in my opinion at least from the CNN guys), but who is doing the measuring to begin with?

Dad bloggers don't read dad blogs - Sure I do. Everyday. Commenting is not my strongest point but in all honesty most of what I read is in my Feed Reader and I just read through as the posts come in. I do post comments on the ones I read in a web browser. But to say we aren't reading other dad blogs? Rubbish. I know plenty that read quite a few. We even read mom blogs too. How about that?

2010 is the year of the Daddy Blogger. Next year you will be gone - In case you haven't read this, I think it explains it all pretty well. I don't plan on going anywhere for quite a while. Sure, I have seen a lot of blogs come and go in the very short time I have been doing this, but I have also seen some that have been around for quite a while. Once again, I think it comes down to why we are doing this in the first place. Years and years from now, we may not have Facebook, Twitter may be the new Google and taking over the world, and blogs may be visible through special glasses (hey I still dream like a child). Even if my family are the only ones wearing my blog's glasses, I will still be here writing and sharing. 

Final Summation: I don't know why the fuss is all of a sudden becoming a thing, which I'm sure will pass sometime this week. I don't understand why it is considered so important to compare dad blogs with mom blogs, this blog with that blog, and worry so much about the stats. I guess, for me anyway, it's whatever. As long as I am a dad, and I have the ability to post to this blog, I will be doing just that. I don't care if I never make a living from The DaddyYo Blog, or if I ever hit 1000 unique visits in one week. I don't care if I never sell a single ad space or pick up an endorsement. What I do care about is that i have made the commitment to be here for quite a while. What I do care about is that I am a dad. I'm not a mom, I'm not a pro blogger. I am a dad with things to share, and regardless of what is going on in the blogosphere, I plan to continue to do what I do, and the dude will always abide. 


Dad U said...

Touche. (aka, about as much response as you will get from a dad anyway, IRL)

Y'know dude, that was about right on. Here we are sitting back and doing our thing, be it bread winner, sahd, whatever, trying to juggle all the balls that are up in the air, doing the best we can for our marriage, kids and family, and along the way we just happened to decide to have a crack at a blog. Whats the big deal? Now we have some cheap shots coming in from several sides. I for one say:
Hahahahahaha. I dont care what you think.
Im going to keep doing what Im doing, regardless of whether some self appointed critic assesses that, in fact, my
I might even make myself a badge of honor that says "This Blog Sucks", just to celebrate the idiocy of those who currently hold the microphone.
Sheesh. It's so much easier to criticize than to create.

Dad of Divas said... definitely have me rooting for you to hit 1000 UVPM in a weel...and I am proof thatDads do read other blogs (imagine that). Noce post and you know that I am in this with you!

Dr.Shawn said...

Amen buddy! I think all those stirring drama and comparisons need to get a grip on reality or their self esteem.

Lance Burson said...

If I have an issue and I really don't, with "dad" blogs it's the corner they paint themselves into. Mommy blogs loudly and proudly and arrogantly trumpet their narrow vision of boob feeding, pet causes, the world is going to heck in a plastic bag because the local grocery store doesn't carry guave.

I am a husband, for the second time, and a dad to 3 daughters. We are a blended family. Our issues are unique, in some ways, and very familiar in others.

"dad" blogs appeal to me only in that I like hearing other dudes, stay at home or career leading (like me), talk about raising their kids, trying to keep their sex lives going, and setting examples of how to lead a family.

I also appeciate hearing what a dad's favorite football team is and how they busted their tail to get home from their kid's soccer game to see the big game. Often, I find, dad blogs lose themselves in minutae of food allergies, product buys, and whatever their wives' point of view is or are.

I just wish dad blogs were as fierce, independent, and for the love of Joe Strummer, punk rock. That's why I don;t label myself a daddy blogger. I'm a dude who blogs and I;m a dad.

Anonymous said...

@Lance very good points indeed. I am hoping to get more comments in and find out what everyone's point of view is. For me, however, I don't see how talking about local grocery stores and hurrying home from my child's game because I am caught up on a pro game on tv relates to being a dad, so rarely will you find that here. For me, dad blogging is about being dad, not a football fanatic or pissed off guy who was at the bar that didn't have bud light on tap. know what I mean? I have another blog for all that ;)

Anonymous said...

@Lance forgot, all the views in this blog, unless stated as a guest post, are all my own. My wife can't be the dad, only I can ;)

Lance Burson said...

cool. For the record, I liek your blog. I was speaking of daddy and mommy blogs in general. I read you and Chalkboard and Alan's blog and a couple of others every day. I was speaking to the topic in a philosophical sense. Not being critical of you. I liek your humor a lot. Its amazingly relatable.

Anonymous said...

@Lance it's all good. It's what discussion is all about. Thanks for liking the blog though. That makes one of you HAHA

DC said...

I just started a dad blog, maybe it sucks, I don't know. It will improve... If I keep at it right? At the end of the day, it gives me a chance to write. I could see how someone might say mom blogs kick ass in comparison, but that's probably because there are so many more of them out there... Lots of examples, and many have been writing for years and years (evolving). On the other side of the coin, dad blogs are more exclusive.

DadStreet said...

Ummm guess what??? I know longer have to write a post about this. You just did it for me!!! Good one!

WillBinMN said...

I missed all of this talk about Dad Blogs sucking. However, one thing I recently read is that Dads that don't blog do not read Dad Blogs. Generally speaking I think that is true. I agree that dad bloggers are reading other blogs. I leave comments on blogs quite often and I notice a lot of different dad bloggers making comments as well.

I think you summed everything up very well. If you have links to any of the blog posts stating these things about dad blogs please share. I would like to read in full.

Eric said...

Great post bud.. I should try one time just putting a bunch of fake ads on my blog and for a week just give out recipes and coupon codes..

Danny Grubb said...

How can you do Blogging wrong? Blogging is different things to different people. Furthermore, having a strong discussion on fatherhood, regardless of the medium is something that our culture sorely needs.

Can someone provide examples on where this opinion is being communicated? I'd like to comment on those posts directly.

Also, Dad Bloggers read Dad Blogs... what a silly statement.

Anonymous said...

Great discussion going on here! I will look through my history and tweet out the links I have read these statements on.

HumbledDad said...

I don't blog. I write for my wife's blog occasionally and others. I would like to echo Lance's observation about the mommy blogs, that they do tend to have a more defined POV's and personalities because of the subject matter they blog on (Attachment parenting, RIE, Waldorf, Breastfeeders, FormulaFeeders, etc). It's like niche programming -- and in that way, they seem better branded as a group than dad bloggers.

And, yes, obviously I read dad bloggers.

Clark Kent's Lunchbox said...

Gotta say, it's been an interesting few days in the dad-o-sphere, what with all the "suck-age" and all. I've been cruising around catching all the thoughts and reactions which have ranged from well-thought our commentaries to dad blog divas.

Based on what I've read, the discussion boils down to the effectiveness of dad blogs as a platform to demonstrate how involved today's fathers are, and to prove we are nothing like the stereotypes presented in main-stream media. Within the dad blog community, we know we don't suck. We are supportive and we look to promote our fellow dad bloggers. However, we can't change that negative perception of ourselves that exists outside our community just as pure daddy bloggers (and by "pure" I mean those of us who write about our lives as dads), because we are not pulling in that audience.

So, if we're not getting that audience and we want to change the daddy-duffus paradigm, then we have to go out like Chris Brogan who's known for social media marking savvy or Geek Dad from Wired Magazine and be dads who blog in communities outside of our niche. This really is what the moms have been very effective at over the past several years which is why many of them chafe at being deemed "mommy bloggers" because they consider themselves, instead, to be moms who blog.

Daddy Yo, you're tracking with your thoughts, as are many of the comments--that's good stuff. The more discussion, the better. Thanks.

SingleMamaAdventures said...


Anonymous said...

Hey, thanks for your comments on my last post about this. I've actually been learning a lot about the dad blog community over the weekend. Keep on keepin' it real!

Jack said...

Whiny dads, why I ought to smack you all in the head. Or maybe kick you in the balls. Hell, every video I see of a dad is him getting hit in the balls.

But I digress. We are good. We are fine. We are men. Now pass the beer.

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