A Time for Everything: Sunday Thoughts

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:

a time to be born and a time to die; a time to plant and a time to uproot,

a time to kill and a time to heal; a time to tear down and a time to build,

a time to weep and a time to laugh; a time to mourn and a time to dance,

a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them; 

a time to embrace and a time to refrain; a time to search and a time to give up,

a time to keep and a time to throw away; a time to tear and a time to mend,

a time to be silent and a time to speak; a time to love and a time to hate,

a time for war and a time for peace." - Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (NIV)

For the longest time, when I was younger,  I always thought that this was just a song by The Byrds. It was a long time before I knew that it was actually a bible verse. Either way, song or verse, it is such a powerful read. There is a time for everything in life. A concept that becomes more and more clear as life progresses.

There is a time for everything we do and everything that happens in our lives. I think the hardest part though is knowing when it's the time for what it's time for. How are we to decide when it is time for one thing and when to switch gears and make it time for another? Is is something that comes with age and experience? Or is it something that comes with a certain amount of faith and hope? Who knows, life is like that. There is something to be said for knowing when it is time to change, and time to move on in a different direction.

Life brings us to points in which we must make decisions and move in a little different of a shuffle. We realize that things are not exactly as they should be, or not how we want them to be, and we must decide what to do next. Often times there is a large amount of uncertainty, sense of being scared, or even downright freaking out! No matter what though, there is the knowledge that it is time for change. A knowledge more important than anything you can ever learn in a book or in the news. The seasons change, the seasons turn. And with the change comes new life and new chances. Chances to be better. Chances to love more and laugh more. Chances to make everything right again and continue on in a new and brighter direction. 

New Years: Just Another Day

The fireworks, the ball drop in Times Square, champagne and resolutions. Just a few things that come to mind when one thinks about the upcoming New Year’s Eve and New Year’s day festivities. There is so much anticipation, excitement, and a certain amount of uncertainty as we approach the new year.

So why do I not feel any kind of excitement this year? Why do I not feel the urge to set resolutions and goals and celebrate a year that has passed? Perhaps it is because I am older. I have a wife, kids, a job, bills, and this one night seems to pale in comparison to all of that. Maybe it is because I have been too busy to realize how quickly this year is coming to an end. Perhaps it is something a little bit deeper.

We all talk about resolutions: Our goals, hopes, and promises for the new year. For many of us parents it revolves around being a better parent, more involved, or doing more things with the kids. A lot of us married men tend to lean towards being a better husband, more loving, listening more, and treating our wives the way they deserve. This is where I lose the passion for the celebration. Are these not things that we should strive for any day, any time, and anywhere?

I always seem to set the same goals every year. Quit smoking, be a better dad and husband, do this and that. Every year though, I seem to fail. I started thinking about this last night and came to the conclusion that maybe I should stop worrying about once a year goals, and start focusing on goals in general. Why do we place such importance on this once a year and not year round?

This coming year I have but one resolution: To focus on my life as a dad and husband every day. Not just setting goals on January 1st, but striving to be a better person, better husband, and better dad, every day, all year long. I want to be the best dad and best husband I can be. That’s not just a goal for the year, that’s a goal for every day of my life. I am not going to worry about what I want to do in 365 days. I am going to focus on what I need to do for that day, one day at a time.

Maybe I have put too much thought into this. Maybe I’m on the verge of a great personal breakthrough. Who knows, life is like that. I do know this though: For my wife, my children, and myself, I will continually try to be a better person each day. It is what they deserve and what I am called to do.

How about you? What personal goals do you hope to accomplish, not just for the year, but for each day, one day at a time?

A Few Cents and Thoughts: Dad Blogs

I decided to postpone my next post in "The Truth Balance" to post a response of sorts to the growing thought within the dad blog community that "we suck" and "we do it all wrong". In the last few days I have read more and more posts, comments and tweets that suggest that dad bloggers suck, that dad bloggers are just doing everything wrong and will never be as successful as mom bloggers, and so on. I have been mulling the idea and thought behind this post all day and I just figured, what have I got to lose? There are several points that I have come across within the whole conversation and reactions found around the web and I am going to just touch briefly on each one and throw my thoughts out there.  *Note: This post is not a personal attack on anyone, or any blogs, writings or etc. I just found the swaying fence of the topic intriguing and I had a response to it.*

Dad blogs suck - Um, okay, first off, says who? I know I don't have a top notch blog with 1000 readers and subscribers, tons of ads clogging up the sidebars and all that. And yes, some of you may think it just flat out sucks. If you do, tell me, don't categorize me. The question is who are we letting decide this and why are we letting it dictate a general thought about all dad blogs? When did it become the thing to automatically join the thoughts of few, then provide it as truth to the masses?

Dad blogs will never be as successful as mom blogs - How does one measure the success of a parenting blog? Is it the number of readers and subscribers? Is it the number of sponsorships, ads, and giveaways? Is it the money generated through selling one's own products and google ads? I'm not sure. I don't really think anyone can really measure the success of a blog. Success, in my opinion, can only be measured by the writer based on whatever they are trying to accomplish. If you are trying to bank 100 dollars a month in ads and you do, then success. If you are trying to average 1000 unique visits a month and you do, success. If you are just looking to write for your sake and people read it and like it anyway, success. No, dad blogs might not get the world's attention (the CNN piece was a crock in my opinion at least from the CNN guys), but who is doing the measuring to begin with?


Dad bloggers don't read dad blogs - Sure I do. Everyday. Commenting is not my strongest point but in all honesty most of what I read is in my Feed Reader and I just read through as the posts come in. I do post comments on the ones I read in a web browser. But to say we aren't reading other dad blogs? Rubbish. I know plenty that read quite a few. We even read mom blogs too. How about that?


2010 is the year of the Daddy Blogger. Next year you will be gone - In case you haven't read this, I think it explains it all pretty well. I don't plan on going anywhere for quite a while. Sure, I have seen a lot of blogs come and go in the very short time I have been doing this, but I have also seen some that have been around for quite a while. Once again, I think it comes down to why we are doing this in the first place. Years and years from now, we may not have Facebook, Twitter may be the new Google and taking over the world, and blogs may be visible through special glasses (hey I still dream like a child). Even if my family are the only ones wearing my blog's glasses, I will still be here writing and sharing. 


Final Summation: I don't know why the fuss is all of a sudden becoming a thing, which I'm sure will pass sometime this week. I don't understand why it is considered so important to compare dad blogs with mom blogs, this blog with that blog, and worry so much about the stats. I guess, for me anyway, it's whatever. As long as I am a dad, and I have the ability to post to this blog, I will be doing just that. I don't care if I never make a living from The DaddyYo Blog, or if I ever hit 1000 unique visits in one week. I don't care if I never sell a single ad space or pick up an endorsement. What I do care about is that i have made the commitment to be here for quite a while. What I do care about is that I am a dad. I'm not a mom, I'm not a pro blogger. I am a dad with things to share, and regardless of what is going on in the blogosphere, I plan to continue to do what I do, and the dude will always abide. 

Late Night Thoughts

It is shortly before 1am right now and i find myself awake and thinking once again. Everyone else is asleep and I am lying here wide awake. Times like these i do the most thinking.

I think about my kids and my job as a dad and how I am doing with it. Are they happy? Are they healthy? Do they know that daddy loves them? Am I a good dad, bad dad, okay dad, or average dad? These and many more questions run through my mind on these late nights.

I hope my children know that I love them and that they feel this love from me at all times. I hope that my parenting skills have helped to ensure that they are in good health. And I hope that I have done what it takes to make them happy. Sure they are so young, but happiness is something everyone at every age is entitled to.

Perhaps I spend too much time thinking. Maybe I have nothing to worry about. I through these doubts and fears to the wind and try to clear myself of worry. Nobody said it would be easy. They just said it would be.