Friday, June 4, 2010

Window to the World: A Dad's Eye View

When I was little it always seemed that all the world was a stage and that life was a movie starring myself. I could never see the dangers that lie ahead in life, the letdowns, the downsides that everyone must experience. Change was happening all around, but I couldn't see it, couldn't understand it.

Now I have two little ones of my own, and the view of the world has changed so much. Activities that as a child seemed so harmless, I now look at with fear while watching my children.

Jokes that seemed so funny, so harmless in high school, now seem so cruel, so uncalled for and shameful.

I guess that's how it is when you grow up and have children. The world is in a constant state of change, but so am I. The view through the window is never the same twice, and neither is the view from the eye's of a dad. I want the best for my children, for them to be happy, healthy and safe. I don't see the world as I once did. I know about the dangers, the unfairness, the letdowns my children will face. I don't see the unending canvas of endless possibilities of fun and excitement. 

My eyes see the world in a different light now. But I guess that's part of the job and part of growing up. I see the world as a dad would see it. A scary place to set your kids into, a place of uncertainty and excitement. A challenge to show the world who I am as a dad as it reflects through my children. A challenge against the visions of manhood we see displayed all around us, and a fight against the way the world depicts me as being a dad. 

Maybe I'm just rambling, and perhaps the words will get lost with the past views that have passed in front of my window. Perhaps it's not the world that has changed, just I. Just me. Just dad.

Old window and wall by Petr Kratochvil


Portland Dad said...

It is in light of that duality, the way you saw and now see, that the challenge of being a father lies. Do you let your kids do the things you did but now see as too dangerous, if so how much and where is the line. If not are you robbing them of that transformation. This is where I find the challenge of always protecting while helping them expand their boundaries and experience the joys and dangers of growing up. Well written and pulled together post, it was far from rambaling.

Que said...

Very well said. What I like and dislike hasn't changed much but my perception has completely changed. Then I multiply that by 10 since I have 3 girls. The world looks completely different than it did even 5 years ago.

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